That’s what you are told when
diagnosed with POTS. When I first heard that I kind of pushed it aside
and ignored it, thinking it sounded really………….hmm…..can I say spoiled
and……selfish. I thought that if I just
pushed through the fatigue and the ‘not feeling well’ and stopped slacking that
I might be able to learn how to deal with it.
NOT a good idea. I guess I'm sort
of learning just what it might mean..........especially this week. Sunday
night I babysat a 2 1/2 year old. For about an hour and a half, she
literally screamed, fussed, cried ect. It completely wore me OUT. mom had to come over and put her to bed for me.....I
was conked out on the sofa. I think it
was the noise and stress of trying to stop her crying that did it. I ended up sleeping ok, and when I got back
home in the morning I went back to bed.
I had planned on taking my last Chemistry test that morning because I
had PT later in the morning and I had to babysit overnight again Monday
night. I figured that I would be too
tired to it do later so it was basically then or never………so I thought. Mom was not
convinced that I should take it because I bombed the same test a month or so
prior partially because of fatigue and ‘brain fog’…….thanks to POTS!! So I just rested for a little while and left
for PT later that morning.
The news with PT is short but a
lot! I have one more appointment before
being discharged!!!!!!!!!!!! The other thing is I’m probably going to have to
see a doctor for my hip to find out if they can’t do some non-surgical stuff to
it. And I’m not sure what’s going to
happen to my ankle. It still bothers me
a bit and I now have tendonitis in it but it really doesn’t stop me from doing
anything, only hurts occasionally.
After PT and lunch, I slept most of
the 2 hour drive home, and that’s including thirty minutes of waiting for mom
to get out of the grocery store (something I never do). Once I came home I went straight to bed and
slept for about three hours. Mom had to
try to wake me up several times and each time I went right back to sleep. I finally got up and had dinner. Around that time I found out that the
babysitting job had been canceled…………more sleep! I was in bed around eight
thirty or nine and got up around nine thirty in the morning. By then I think I felt like I was beginning
to revive some, enough to take the test.
This past week has been basically
been about not overdoing it. If I want
or need to do something I have to prioritize and not do everything at once or
in one day. I’m not good at it and
probably drive mom up the wall when I insist on
doing stuff. Hopefully I can get the
hang of it SOON!
I can't say that "living life
on your own pace" is selfish because sometimes you really don't have a
choice. You may insist on something but your body can insist on something
entirely different and it usually wins. It’s the admitting it and
actually "living life at your own pace" that is the hard part. It’s
not that you are giving up, it’s just you have to be more creative and unique
with what you do and how.
