"Why are you troubled, and why do doubts arise in your hearts?  See my hands and my feet, that it is myself.  Touch me and see."      Luke 24:38-39

From the General himself

On May 2, 1863, General Thomas Jackson (nicknamed Stonewall) of the Confederate Army, was visited by Chaplain Lacy after losing his arm from a bullet wound accidentally shot by one of his own men.

You see me severely wounded but not depressed.....I am sure that my Heavenly Father designs this affliction for my good.  I am perfectly satisfied, that either in this life, or in that which is to come, I shall discover that what is now regarded as a calamity, is a blessing.....If it were in my power to replace my arm, I would not dare to do it, unless I could know it was the will of my Heavenly Father.

Your Love Never Fails

Love cranking this song way up there! SO good:)

Verse of the Week

"Fear not, for I have redeemed you; I have called you by name, you are mine.  When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and through the rivers, they shall not overwhelm you; when you walk through fire you shall not be burned, and the flame shall not consume you."  Isaiah 43:1-2

Verse of the week

"and He will be the stability of your times, abundance of salvation, wisdom, and knowledge; the fear of the LORD is Zion's treasure."     Isaiah 33:6

Verse of the Week

"And though the LORD give you the bread of adversity and the water of affliction, yet your Teacher will not hide himself anymore, but your eyes shall see your Teacher. And your ears shall hear a word behind you, saying, "This is the way, walk in it," when you turn to the right or when you turn to the left."     Isaiah 30:20-21

Verse of the week

"Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, and endures all things."           ~ 1 Corinthians 13:7

God Of My Everything

Just a little warning,  after the song at 3:29 there is absolutely nothing.  I'm not sure why but there is almost five minutes of 'absolute nothing' on the video.  Kinda odd :)  I hope y'all enjoy the song!

"live life at your own pace" ??

That’s what you are told when diagnosed with POTS.  When I first heard that I kind of pushed it aside and ignored it, thinking it sounded really………….hmm…..can I say spoiled and……selfish.  I thought that if I just pushed through the fatigue and the ‘not feeling well’ and stopped slacking that I might be able to learn how to deal with it.   NOT a good idea.  I guess I'm sort of learning just what it might mean..........especially this week.  Sunday night I babysat a 2 1/2 year old.  For about an hour and a half, she literally screamed, fussed, cried ect.  It completely wore me OUT.  mom had to come over and put her to bed for me.....I was conked out on the sofa.  I think it was the noise and stress of trying to stop her crying that did it.  I ended up sleeping ok, and when I got back home in the morning I went back to bed.  I had planned on taking my last Chemistry test that morning because I had PT later in the morning and I had to babysit overnight again Monday night.  I figured that I would be too tired to it do later so it was basically then or never………so I thought. Mom was not convinced that I should take it because I bombed the same test a month or so prior partially because of fatigue and ‘brain fog’…….thanks to POTS!!  So I just rested for a little while and left for PT later that morning. 

The news with PT is short but a lot!  I have one more appointment before being discharged!!!!!!!!!!!! The other thing is I’m probably going to have to see a doctor for my hip to find out if they can’t do some non-surgical stuff to it.  And I’m not sure what’s going to happen to my ankle.  It still bothers me a bit and I now have tendonitis in it but it really doesn’t stop me from doing anything, only hurts occasionally. 

After PT and lunch, I slept most of the 2 hour drive home, and that’s including thirty minutes of waiting for mom to get out of the grocery store (something I never do).  Once I came home I went straight to bed and slept for about three hours.  Mom had to try to wake me up several times and each time I went right back to sleep.  I finally got up and had dinner.  Around that time I found out that the babysitting job had been canceled…………more sleep! I was in bed around eight thirty or nine and got up around nine thirty in the morning.  By then I think I felt like I was beginning to revive some, enough to take the test. 

This past week has been basically been about not overdoing it.  If I want or need to do something I have to prioritize and not do everything at once or in one day.  I’m not good at it and probably drive mom up the wall when I insist on doing stuff.  Hopefully I can get the hang of it SOON!

I can't say that "living life on your own pace" is selfish because sometimes you really don't have a choice.  You may insist on something but your body can insist on something entirely different and it usually wins.  It’s the admitting it and actually "living life at your own pace" that is the hard part. It’s not that you are giving up, it’s just you have to be more creative and unique with what you do and how.  

  I'm dearly loved

Forgiven beloved

Hidden in Christ

Made in the image of the Giver of Life

Righteous and holy

Reborn and remade

Accepted and worthy this is our new name

Bad day

Having a really bad day.  I'm not really feeling well.  POTS is giving me a fit :(  Just need to keep drinking fluid and rest in the arms of the One who holds the world in His hands.  Hope ya'll enjoy the song!! Crank it up! :-)

"Fear not for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand."   Isaiah 41:10

On My Mind

"You keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on you, because he trusts in you.  Trust in the Lord forever, for the Lord God is an everlasting rock."         Isaiah 26:3-4

On My Mind

 Peace in acceptance
Acceptance is not a sign of weakness, but is a place where peace can dwell.  God sometimes uses our pain and struggles to show us just how much we need to depend on Him.  It can also provide a bridged gap in which we can reach others.  This doesn't mean that once we accept, we have everything figured out or live perfect lives, it just means that through the tears, pain, doubt there is a purpose and a greater cause that we couldn't possible imagine.

"So, I am praying while feeling restless, at peace while tempted, safe while anxious, surrounded by a cloud of light while still in darkness, in love while still doubting."                              ~Nenri Nouwen